Today I am reminded how important these little people are. These little hearts that we get for such a short time.
There’s nothing more important than loving them with everything we’ve got for every moment we get. The laundry and dishes will get done. The cleaning can wait. I know you’re tired, exhausted even. I know you feel like you’ll collapse if you have to get one more snack or blow one more nose.
But this is sacred work. Heart work.
And someday, you’re gonna miss this so much it will break your heart.
So sit your butt down and build a Lego house. Or get your butt up and push the swing. Look her in the eye and ask her what she wants to play and then do it. And then when it’s finally time for her to take a break, pick up the baby and snuggle her and tickle her and look into her eyes. Give them everything you’ve got.
And when you need a break, step away. Breathe. Cut yourself some slack and take care of you, mama.
And then muster your strength, remember what a gift these little humans are, and get back in there.
We painted a wall today, the first wall we have painted since moving in almost a year ago. I love that my oldest helped. It would have been easier to do it when she wasn’t around. But I love that she gets to learn and be included in projects. In creating our home.
And I love the color. I love it. This house has always felt so peaceful to me. My last house was inspiring. This house, peaceful. The color is perfect.
In other news, I finally caved and put away most of the six month clothes to make room for the nine month clothes. My youngest has been “hulking out” of her sixth monthers for a little while, but I refuse to believe time is moving so fast.
She’s also still sleeping in our room, and is rapidly approaching the weight limit on the bassinet insert in the pack and play. I know it’s time to move her to her room. I know it is. But I loathe the idea.
However, I’ve been getting nervous about the weight limit predicament and I know, rather than remove it and change up the pack and play I should just move her to her room. But like I said before… loathe.
This evening I took the insert out of the pack and play and set it up for her to sleep in it the regular way. Next to my bed.
I know, I know. But she’s got the rest of her life to sleep in her own room.
We took one lap around the block without training wheels on.
Teaching stuff like this is hard. I never know when to let go.
She had two birthday parties today, her two oldest friends.
I’m grateful for her friends.
Get both kids to bed by 9:30.
Collapse onto couch.
Wake up at 1 am in same position on couch.
Go to bed.
This is pretty much me every evening. I’m not sure if it’s parenting, repaying a sleep debt, fighting off the tiny human germs, or what. But I do know that I’m tired.
This baby steals my heart every day.
She had graduation tonight from the preschool daycare where she has gone since she was a baby. Even though she has only gone one morning a week for the last year, and most of the people who have taught her over the years don’t work there anymore, it still made me realize how much they did to help me raise her.
I don’t remember what it was like to drop my ten week old baby off and go to work…it’s been so long ago. But I know that to have had a place for her to go that I could trust, a place that kept her safe and helped turn her into this amazing little human being that she is today is one of the greatest gifts a mama could ask for.