Sooooo, I’m a little behind on daily photos and am catching up today. Most days I know what photo I’m going to use and what I’m going to write, I just…procrastinate.
I didn’t have a photo or topic in mind for Thursday May 28th. So I scanned back through my photos to jog the memory of the day. There were only two photos from the whole day, which is rare.
But perfect. Because this was one of them.
Thursday started off hard. I found myself in a situation where I got zapped by someone else’s humor at my expense. They made a joke in front of a group of peers about a quality of mine that I’m not particularly proud of and that I’m working on changing. Getting put on blast for it caught me off guard and I felt like I had walked into an electric fence.
I didn’t understand why this person would do that–why publicly shaming someone else would ever be funny. It was easy to feel mad and hurt and betrayed.
And yet, as I was processing through my hurt, I found grace in the fact that we have all made careless mistakes with our words before. I know what it’s like to hurt someone without meaning to. I have no business holding a grudge when I’m just as guilty. I’m no better than her or anyone else.
That evening I hung out with my cherished group of women, my people, my “club”. I adore these women with all my heart. They are the safe harbor in the storm. I hold each one of them up on a pedestal because that’s where they belong. They are incredible human beings.
But then again, aren’t we all? Just as I am no better than anyone else at their worst, I am also no worse than anyone else at their best. I am deeply human. I try. And I care. I matter. Just like everyone else. We all deserve our own little pedestal made of grace and forgiveness and love.
My people, they are always there if I need them. They forgive me in my ungracious moments and they accept me flaws and all.
And in doing so they have shown me how to do the same for others.
That morning, reeling from the shock of unexpected hurt, I told myself that this place, this relationship, was an unhealthy place to be. I didn’t need to spend time around people who hurt me. I was done.
But the truth is, I’ve been through enough in this lifetime to know that the solution to being hurt isn’t always leaving. Sometimes the solution is staying.
Because my friend didn’t mean to hurt me. People don’t deserve any less grace, any less love, because they are human and flawed and messy. In fact, perhaps they deserve more because of it.
I’m beyond blessed to have those friends that assume the best, that stand up for me and always have my back. But the real blessing is having those people who teach you how to do that for others. To offer grace rather than hold a grudge. To believe the best.
To not run away just because it’s messy, but instead to offer a hand and help someone back up on their pedestal.