This photo is actually from last Wednesday. I’m posting it now because I’m behind on writing. There are spells of inspiration and motivation, and spells where I just can’t seem to find the balance. Can you guess which one I’m in?
Last Wednesday, I didn’t pay enough attention to her. Ironically, we weren’t even that busy. Gymnastics has moved to Monday nights in preparation for soccer starting next week. So tonight was open. But somehow the evening slipped away and it was past bedtime and as soon as I tucked her in I could tell she realized it too. So I crawled in bed with her and we layed there in the dark and talked and giggled. Usually bedtime is a boundary I don’t break, but tonight I didn’t even look at the clock. I was simply present with her. It felt like our own sacred little slumber party.
We joked about if we had a hundred kids. It made me laugh that she talks like “we” are having the kids, like she is on team grownup. Ah my sweet firstborn. We laughed at all the things we would need more of. More beds. More rooms. More plates. More swings. More underwear. It was silly and perfect.
Eventually I had to kiss her goodnight and leave her to sleep. I don’t want the days where I can crawl in bed with her and giggle about silly things to ever end.